if you’ve been around the last coupleyears, you’ll remember that Mister Man and i celebrate our anniversary with the traditional gift rules. year three is leather.
in the past year of being married to this man, i learned that in addition to picking a great husband, i picked a real good baby daddy. (i also learned that when you have a baby, you don’t have very many pictures of the two of you without said baby in them.) i couldn’t have imagined a better partner to raise children with than my Mister Man.
i don’t have a lot of words to say this year. mostly because i’m very, very tired. but not as tired as i would be if Mister Man didn’t help me as much he does. he pulls more than his weight around the house, he gets up with amelia all the time so i can at least stay in bed some nights, and he still manages to take care of the two of us with a smile on his face.
i don’t know what i did to get so lucky as to have him by my side for the rest of my life. i really don’t deserve it. i’m just happy that God sees fit to bless even the most undeserving of us with wonderful people in our lives.
Mister Man, you are my reason for getting up with a smile on my face in the morning and you will always be my favorite person to go to sleep next to. i don’t know how the next 50 years could possible beat the last three, but the best part is, i know they will. every day is an adventure with you.
mister man and i had our first date night away from the baby last night. it was amazing. and not “amazing but i missed my baby so much” amazing, it was “amazing and i wish i could have had a second cocktail” amazing. we ate a delicious dinner, i drank a pumpkin manhattan, and we talked about grown up things unrelated to our child’s bodily functions.
what is it about date nights that feel so special once you have a baby? is it the feeling of playing hooky from parenthood? is it that you can put on your fancy clothes and remember what it feels like to just be yourselves again? is it just the ability to order a strong cocktail and drink it all without being interrupted? i guess it doesn’t really matter, because at the end of the day, it’s magic in some form or another.
our daughter has all of a sudden turned into a happy, smiling, lovable ball of joy. not that i didn’t think that she was the most precious peach in the whole before now, it’s just that she was…less than happy, let’s say (i have more to say about that soon). now, well, now she wakes up with a smile and a giggle for me, and we spend the day chatting together in a baby language only we understand. we talk about things like daily plans and where we should take a walk and how to solve the national debt crisis. she’s got some good ideas that girl. she is also laying down some mad flirting game for any male she sees…we’re going to be in trouble someday.
she also is doing this all of a sudden, which means that tomorrow she’ll be eating solids and in a week she’ll be off to college:
it’s a weird thing to answer the question, “what have you been up to?” when you’re on maternity leave. the answer is complicated. i’m doing everything and nothing at the same time. i’m watching lots of crappy tv and also keeping my child alive. the shorter/more socially acceptable answer is “oh just hanging around the house, getting out when we can, not a whole lot of anything really.” but what i really want to say is “i’ve been teaching my little girl how to exist in our world, it’s exhausting and awesome and i want to talk about it all the time!”
in case you haven’t noticed, it’s decorative gourd season mofos (points for anyone who gets that reference). normally i would be crafting something like a seasonally appropriate garland, or making plans for some festive activities. this year, since it’s a feat to manage to get dressed every day, i’m feeling a little lackluster in the fall spirit, and since i’m as basic as you can get (give me all the hot cider/crunching leaves/pumpkin spice lattes/boots&jeans/etc.) this has pained me. so i set a goal for myself last week to do one fun fall thing, and i think i managed TWO(!). you shall see for yourself in the coming week. any guesses what they were? hint: think super stereotypical fall things.
and with that, i end these musings for today. thank you for getting inside my head with me. i’d love to hear the random thoughts bouncing around your heads if you would be so kind as to entertain me with them!
Mister Man and I are extremely happy to announce the birth of our first child. amelia joyce was born on august 18th at 11:51 in the evening, and weighed in at 7 lbs. 2 oz, and was 19.5 inches long. both amelia and dad and i are doing well. thank you so much for all the well wishes and love that you have given us during the last 9 months. we are blessed to have you in our lives.
what else can i say about this man on his thirtieth birthday that i haven’t already said?
he is the love of my life. he is my partner in crime. he is the father of my child. he makes me laugh every day. he is a provider and a caretaker, a nurturer and a protector. how i ended up sharing my life with this one never ceases to amaze me and inspire my prayers of gratitude.
and today he turns thirty.
cheers to you on this special birthday, and to many more. i love you Mister Man.
p.s. i didn’t know he could do a one-armed pushup until last night. BUT HE CAN. the man is incredible.
we’re sitting on the couch together, watching some show or another, as we do so often now. you stay in a lot when only one of you can drink and the other one has trouble staying up past 11:00pm. it’s just more fun that way, plus you can wear your soft clothes. so we’re watching our show, relaxing after a long day of cleaning the house (me) and working on the nursery (him). the nesting has started with a vengeance in both of us, with every inch of the house getting scrubbed and dusted and polished. it’s our way of controlling the very uncontrollable parts of this new chapter that’s speeding into our lives.
all of a sudden, he puts his hand on my belly. or as we call it in this household, the baby. my belly has ceased to be my belly, it’s now the baby’s house.
he does this a lot, but for some reason it makes me stop and notice this time. so much has changed in just a few short months.
in the beginning, me being pregnant was nothing but an abstract for him. it was something that could only be proven by two pink lines on a stick, and a couple blurry black and white pictures of what the ultrasound tech assured us was our baby. he had to take me at my word that the reason i couldn’t stay up past nine was because there was a little human inside me taking all my energy to grow its fingers and toes and eyelashes.
none of this was “real” to him. the idea of being a dad was just that – an idea. a hypothetical role to be filled at some point in the future, but not just yet. then one day, he put his hand on my belly and he felt our baby move. and that’s when the pieces of the puzzle started to fit. this was no longer just an idea, something that was going to happen, but hadn’t yet. this was something that was actively happening, now, right in front of him. it ceased to exist in the abstract and became real.
now the hand on my belly is a nightly tradition. he plays with baby z. to see if he can get a response back to his pokes. he lays his head on my belly to talk to the little one, mostly telling baby how he’s going to be the fun parent and to always listen to him (baby usually gives him a little punch to the face to set him straight, don’t worry). goodnights always include me and the baby.
and on this night, for whatever reason (maybe all the nesting), it hits me that this is him embracing fatherhood. he knows he’s a dad now, and even though that little boy or girl is still tucked away in my belly, this is his way of spending quality time with them. as endearing as they are, all the nursery prep and diaper lessons in the world can’t compare with how wonderful it is to see that hand on my belly.
i love this man more than words can describe, and to think that i will love him even more when we get to meet our baby? that takes my breath away. so i smile, put my hand over his, and let the moment wash over me.